I learned something new and I want to share it with all of you! I’m still participating in online therapy lessons at Bloom for Women (use code “youareloved” for 15% off of their services if you want to join and learn too!). A few weeks back I was studying self care. Before I started this journey into emotional health I had never heard that term, self care, but as soon as I ventured into the recovery world, I started hearing it a lot. Self care encompasses the activities we participate in to keep ourselves physically and emotionally and spiritually healthy. If my knee is hurting self care could be icing it, stretching out, or going to a doctor. If I’m having anxiety, self care could be diffusing some lavender oil next to my work space and doing yoga. Self care is so important especially in a world where being busy can overtake other goals or, if you’re like me, and you somehow learned growing up that doing something for yourself was selfish.
I still struggle with self care. I’m much better at it than I used to be but through my Bloom for Women classes I learned that I have ways I can enhance it. One specifically. In the class I was reading about tough situations and what often happens to self care when life gets really stressful or difficult and I was at first surprised by what I read and then realized that it was true. The class pointed out that when self care is needed the most is when it is often the most neglected.
For instance. A month or so back I had a stressful situation happen on Facebook. I was an admin for a 12-step type group. The group was secret, I knew a lot of the women in it personally; we used it as a place to share our victories and also ask advice when things were hard. Someone inside the group shared the identities of women in it, to a group of women outside the group. The incident is much more in depth and complicated than that but let’s just say I suddenly had the admins from a fairly large Facebook group breathing down my neck and trying to manipulate me into doing what they wanted and they should never had known that I was part of my group in the first place.
When this happened, and it got really stressful the first thing I did was stop sleeping well. Because I wasn’t sleeping I was so tired in the mornings that I stopped being consistent with my morning yoga. When the weekend came I was still trying to deal with the fallout from this incident so I didn’t pay attention at church and was instead messaging other women from my group and trying to figure out how everything had happened. In short, when I needed self care the most, was when I abandoned it completely. If it hadn’t been for the class I was taking, I would not have noticed what was happening. As soon as I realized what I was doing I did my best to try and combat it by slowing down and being mindful of my physical and emotional needs. I did yoga even if I was tired, I tried harder to go to bed at a reasonable hour, I put my phone down at church and fed my soul.
From now on I will be much more aware, especially during hard and stressful times, of my level of self care and instead of abandoning it when tough situations arise I will do my best to double up! When I’m stressed or scared, twice the amount of yoga and deep breathing would be far more beneficial than not doing it. Haha. I’m not sure why I didn’t realize that years ago. Bloom for Women has been such an awesome resource!